COLUMBIA'S LUNCH REVIEW

Serving too little of a good thing.

The North Main Deli is located a few minutes drive from the downtown area, but many office workers swear that it’s worth the trip. It was with great anticipation that Tank, myself, and our colleague Kali headed out there for a mid-week lunch. Unfortunately, we all left the deli hungry, and if you’re in the restaurant business, that is never a good result.

All of us entered with our minds set on sampling North Main’s “Hot Bar,” but after looking it over we all decided it appeared ... less than appetizing, so we opted to order off the menu. I went with a turkey-spinach wrap and pasta salad, Tank had a chicken salad croissant with potato salad, and Kali had a sandwich on pumpernickel so small that I can’t even remember what meat was supposed to be on it. Some of the items tasted good, but there just wasn’t enough of them to garner a positive eating experience. The pasta salad was adequate for example, but I only got about three bites on my plate. Tank described his potato salad as “warm.” I didn’t ask what that was supposed to mean, but I assume it’s not good.

One positive of the experience was our friendly, if clueless, waiter that hailed from somewhere in Scandinavia. He was fun to listen to, even if we couldn’t understand what he was saying. He was certainly more pleasant than the employee working at the register, who had an awkward confrontation with the customer in line before us that made us second-guess our lunch decision before we ever tasted the food.

On our way back to the office Kali said what we were all thinking when he bemoaned, “Damn, I’m ready to go get some lunch.” It is indeed a dark day when you return to your desk at One hungrier than when you left it at Noon. The meal, as George Clooney famously lamented in O Brother Where Art Thou, “only aroused my appetite without bedding it down.”

-Rabbit