Longhorn Steak House - 902 Gervais Street

Posted by The LunchMen Monday, May 3, 2010

I have been avoiding Longhorn for seven years. For me, even the name conjures up childhood images of family dinners at Western Sizzlin'. While there is nothing wrong with hitting up the Sizzler if you are so inclined, it is no place to go if you are craving food from a good chophouse. I believe the same is true for Longhorn.

Quality meat and proper cooking is everything with a steak. I held the preconceived notion that Longhorn would fall short in both categories, so I steered clear of the steak on our trip so that Longhorn would not have to overcome my prejudice. Tex, however, stayed true to his name and ordered a sirloin steak for lunch. I was glad someone else was willing to man up. Tex's report: "it ain't too bad for a 10-dollar steak." Tex is a living tribute to Waco. His face glowed with glee when he saw the saddles, mounted cow heads, and leather chaps.

The Dude and The Publican both ordered the Seven Pepper Sirloin Salad. The Dude was underwhelmed, but not dissatisfied. The Publican liked his salad, but he is convinced it is the best thing on the menu.

If only I could say the same for my pork chop. It looked alright when it hit the table; the chop had some sear on it, and it was coated in a sweet glaze. The trouble began when I tried to actually bite it. My jaw is still sore from the workout. The Queen of Frozen Cuisine asked me how it was after a couple of bites, and my answer involved a cobbler, shoe-making, etc. - you get the point, it was way too tough to enjoy. I tried covering it with the side helping of apples, but that didn't really help much.

Rabbit ordered the Salmon Caesar salad. The salmon looked overcooked for my taste. He said that it was "about on par with a normal lunch salad in Columbia, for about five bucks or more." Hmmmm, notice a trend going here?

Let's face it. Longhorn is, as The Publican likes to say, A BASTION OF MEDIOCRITY. It is not a terrible place to go take a client for lunch - if you are not very worried about impressing that client. Rabbit does not think that Longhorn should make the Boo List, and he is probably right. Our server was absolutely excellent at her job, and the warm bread that was brought out at the beginning of the meal is a nice touch for the lunch scene. Just don't go into Longhorn with high expectations, and don't order the pork chop.

- Tank

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1 Responses to Longhorn Steak House - 902 Gervais Street

  1. Ashley Smith Says:
  2. Well, you went to the wrong one first off. The one on Decker is the best Longhorn's and does a steak called The Outlaw that rivals many other steakhouses I've eaten at (i.e.- high end ones). Make sure you don't get their "special seasoning" on anything (called Prairie Dust) as it will ruin every piece of meat it touches.

    Secondly, I've had the pork chop at the Decker location as well as the salmon salad, salmon entree, etc. and none of it has ever been dry with the exception of maybe once or twice. Misty quickly remedied this and in less than five minutes I had a new piece of flavorful tasty meat.

    But if you know how to order the food (once again no Prairie Dust!) and you know which servers are the most accommodating (ahem, Misty at the Decker location), then you will definitely not regret going there for a night out on the town. Enjoy!


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Rabbit, Tank, and The Publican are three dudes just trying to get through the work week here in Columbia. Rabbit is a Columbia native, Tank is from Charleston, and The Publican hails from Greenville. Rabbit's favorite lunch spot is the No Name Deli on Elmwood, where you may find him putting down a grilled chicken salad and a side of vinegar pasta. The Publican usually wants to find food to cure his all-too-common hangovers. Tank claims no favorite lunch spot - he lives for the thrill of the hunt.